Bag of Courage is more than a tangible source of personal safety tools, it’s a movement created to encourage conversation. Kaity’s Way is a great resource for both parents and teens to have a productive discussion about safe dating/healthy relationships. We encourage you to share this article.
Kaity’s Way promotes P.E.A.C.E.
By Bobbi Sudberry and Brandy Aguilar on January 6, 2017.
The thing about entering into a relationship with someone is that it is very important to understand what a healthy relationship is and how to exercise certain rights and responsibilities.
There comes a time when young people start to have intimate feelings towards one another. The person of interest is someone they want to get to know and share things with in a way that goes beyond just being friends. The affection they feel comes by instinct, but also by what they see go on around them. There seems to be an emphasis on pairing up with someone eventually. Why not, everyone else is doing it?
If you really think about the elements of a healthy relationship most would come up with characteristics like Patience, Empathy, Acceptance, Caring and Equality, which essentially stands for (P.E.A.C.E.). Those characteristics are what Kaity’s Way promotes to young people. Yet, how often do we actually sit down and assess what goes into a healthy relationship. We go through life emulating what we see. As many say, “live and learn.
For those raised in an environment where domestic violence takes place they see that to be the norm. They learn through experience that power and control is how to express love. Those who grow up in a healthy environment understand the elements of a healthy relationship to some degree, but don’t always understand what to expect from another in a relationship, much less what is expected of them. Sometimes they enter into a relationship with someone who, in the beginning, is very kind and caring, but eventually, as time goes by, they show themselves as an insecure and possessive individual.
According to a study in 2013 by the American Psychological Association, 41 percent of young women report being a victim in an abusive relationship. Keep in mind that abuse comes in many forms, verbal, emotional and psychological usually precedes any physical abuse. Some abusive relationships never get physical, but they are abusive nonetheless because the abuser is exercising power and control. Victims of abusive relationships do not enter into those relationships knowing they are going to be abused. Abusers know they must act appropriately, kind and nice at least until the victim is emotionally invested. It is at this point that the abuser begins to outwardly show their insecurities, possessiveness and jealousy. Often times early on, the abuser shows signs of possessiveness and jealousy, but will justify their reactions in a flattering way, such as:
Four Red Flags That Your are in an Unhealthy Relationship
Think about it this way, if you’re dating someone, usually they are right around your own age, so do they really know so much more than you do that they should tell you what to do and how to act?
Even if they are quite a bit older than you, they should treat you as an equal. When you are in a relationship with someone, you should be able to enjoy your time with them. Where is the enjoyment in being with someone that is giving you
orders and telling you what to do?
These are just a few signs that you’re in an unhealthy relationship. At the end of the day each and every one of us is responsible for our own actions. There is absolutely no excuse to abuse another person in any way. The individual you choose to share your time with should be confident, aspiring, encouraging, respectful, honest, patient, empathetic, accepting, caring, and treat you as an equal.
The bottom line is if someone does or says something that makes you feel uncomfortable, trust your feelings and get out of the situation.
If you’re afraid, Kaity’s Way can help. We have tools and resources to get you the help needed and to understand you’re not alone.
Kaity’s Way is a Non Profit 501(c)(3) Tax Exempt Corporation that was formed in honor of Kaitlyn Marie Sudberry and exists to promote the importance of safe, healthy teen dating relationships and educate the community on issues relating to dating violence.
The mission of Kaity’s Way is to promote healthy relationships in future generations by raising awareness about bullying in youth dating using complementary education. Visit kaitysway.org for more information.